You were determined to regain control of your life, and so you put in the time and effort to do so. This road to recovery was not easy, but you worked hard to get here. Please know what you have accomplished is no easy task and worthy of praise and admiration.
It is possible that on your journey, you may have had to utilize treatment centers, IOP’s, 12 step programs, and different therapy approaches. They may have been integral to getting you to this point. Although now that you have to self-manage, you may be nervous about slipping up. I want to share some evidence-based tips to relieve some of that anxiety and help you stay your course.
1. THE JOURNEY IS ONGOING
After her overdose, Demi Levato said, “What I’ve learned is that this illness is not something that disappears or fades with time. It is something I must continue to overcome, and I’m not done yet.” Sometimes the end goal can seem overwhelming and unattainable, and it can be demotivating. The key is to set simple and realistic goals and work toward them regularly. For instance, going to that next meeting, being honest with yourself, and reminding yourself why you do what you do. All of these are small steps, but they can make a huge difference. Recovery is a process and a journey-not a sprint. It requires upkeep and extending yourself some grace when things do not go according to plan.
2. IT IS OK TO FEEL
Often people use certain substances to cope with emotional pain. While doing so may provide a temporary escape from negative feelings, it will also numb all positive emotions. However, experiencing happiness and joy is crucial to recovery as it is a motivating factor. Working with a therapist can help you slowly unlock and work through complicated feelings and not feel the need to escape. To allow yourself to feel even negative emotions is a necessary part of the healing process. It may not always feel so good, but please know that it means that you are moving forward.
3. BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF AND WITH OTHERS
To satisfy the addiction, people start lying to their loved ones and justify their behavior. Doing so can take a significant toll on relationships and create a codependent dynamic, hostility, guardedness, and cause the relationship to end. Also, it is a disservice to yourself as it steers in the wrong direction. The recovery process requires staying true to yourself and allowing others to help you by being honest about your progress. Without accountability, it is easy to fall back into the vicious cycle that will deter you from achieving your goals.
4. SHAME IS NOT YOUR FRIEND
Guilt says I did something wrong, and shame says I am something wrong. Shame tends to affect a person’s self-worth, while guilt in moderation can help with accountability. In such instances, shame becomes the overpowering feeling and hinders a person’s progress. However, a therapist can help you find a balance between both and help you healthily work through them.
5. CREATE A SUPPORT SYSTEM FOR YOURSELF
Often people that engage in substance use surround themselves with similar peers. Unfortunately, this only adds fuel to the fire as those peers usually encourage the habit. Additionally, shame or fear of rejection further isolates people from their loved ones, who could otherwise help with accountability. Working through some of these feelings with a therapist while simultaneously being in the company of motivating and encouraging people can make a huge difference. Research suggests that a community of safe, empathetic, and supportive people (like an AA program) has shown to be very useful. This article discusses the concept of connectedness in greater detail.
6. IDENTIFY THE UNDERLYING FACTORS CONTRIBUTING TO ADDICTION
Some evidence suggests that people may have a genetic predisposition for substance use. However, it often goes hand in hand with other mental health issues. Doing a deep dive to identify the underlying causes and then working through them could eradicate the urge. Wouldn’t that be wonderful? A mental health professional can help you do that by using a tailored strategy to your specific needs.
I wish you nothing but the best on this journey of yours. If you are looking for a therapist to assist you, then our office has plenty of options. Feel free to look through our website and pick a mental health professional that speaks to you.